Monday, October 27, 2008

My greatest achievement (and how it helps you!)

Time for another post.
This time it's a two parter.
Part the first involves my recent discovery which will no doubt win me the Nobel prize in thirty years or so (the best ideas always take a while to become generally acknowledged by academia-fortunately the arts are not so lumbering).
You, beloved reader, will however be able to take full advantages of its practical applications more or less immediately.
You won't be disappointed.

Part the second is merely me blowing my own horn once again. So I might as well start with that.
My big (24" tall) sumo wrestling toads (weighing in at a hefty 110 lbs) have been selected for the National Sculpture Society's 76 annual show where they will be on display in New York for a bunch of months, and then Brookgreen Gardens in South Carolina. I am of course extremely chuffed at this news.

Now for my life changing discovery. It has the potential to improve human existence the world over, starting with yours right now, so get ready for a raise in your standard of living.
Next time (and after you try it, every time) you take a nice hot bath, fill up a hot water bottle with the same hot water you are running the bath with. This rubber bladder can now be used as a very comfortable cushion behind your head or betwixt blades of shoulder.
Perfect for a bit of extended book reading, but it gets better...
Once you have finished your gripping adventure and returned with a thud to reality, you realize that your bathwater is just about stone cold. Hardly the perfect end to any great story.
Aha, simply retrieve and uncork your water bottle.
The water inside is still nice and piping hot, perfect for a last minute dousing before you emerge from the tub, all shiny, warm and clean.
Life will rarely feel better.
You and me can appreciate this at once, but it will still be 2038 before that Nobel prize shows up on my doorstep.
Where's Winston Churchill when you need him? (he did all his best thinking in the bath, so he'd have sped up the process a bit)
Luckily in the meantime I have little Binky's prizewinning achievements for consolation.

5 comments:

Mad Bush Farm Crew said...

Finally google has allowed me to comment on your fantastic news. Congratulations Steve!!! That is really awesome.

On the life changing discovery I tried it too - and yes it works. Thing is we will somehow have to con the Nobel Peace Prize Committe into giving you that well deserved award.

All the best and hope you are well
Liz

Steve sculpts critters said...

It's weird.
After I left that post a lady in Stockholm,Sweden bought a couple of my mice and is hoping they arrive before the Nobel prize dinner!
I'm hoping she sends some pics I can post!

Mad Bush Farm Crew said...

I hope some pics come too. Those little mice are fantastic and all those other incredible critters you've created.
Liz

namelass2 said...

You are a talented, busy person.
Wish I had your talent. Yes, I love entering contests. Have won trips to London, New York, Philadelphia, Vancouver, etc. Six cars, money and more. My husbnd developed Parkinsons and it became impossible to run around town and enter the locals. Also, entering on the computer isn't as easy as filling out blanks. Your Sumo wrestlers are great!

Tatiana said...

how great!